Re peeing with boners: it's not the boner itself that's the problem, it's the physical bending of one's penis down towards the toilet bowl that causes all these problems. Whilst flaccid, bending one’s penis in any direction is zero trouble. But boners make everything rigid and inflexible. Peeing straight up remains easy. But peeing down is difficult at best. The gent's urethral channel physically kinks like a garden hose, with similar effects on the liquid’s passage within.

If I ever wake up with both a boner and a full bladder, then I'm forced into one of three courses of action:

(1) Wait until it recedes;

(2) Pee in the shower, straight up, and rinse it out straight afterwards;

(3) Go outside and pee in some bushes, or, more likely, over them.