A horrid rectal Rapunzel

Christina asks

I just had to pull a long glob of my own 23” hair from out of my cats literal back end for like a whole minute because she likes to bite my hair when I’m sleeping and apparently she’s swallowing it too. Also I feel like this wasn’t descriptive enough to make you all feel how I feel right now. I do not ever want to do this again. What do?

My answer

Isn’t it obvious? Go Old-Testament on your cat’s ass. Like, properly Biblical. Gobble her own hair in her own sleep. Then poo it out in her presence during occasions chosen special to cause your cat maximum social embarrassment. Maybe on moonlit rooftops when hot youthful male cats are courting her. Just as they’re about to do the bad thing, there you are, glaring into your cat’s eyes and munching anew on her nasal hair and extruding some kind of horrid rectal Rapunzel.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/545286786317245/po...